Category Archives: Politics

Nation’s Most Important Election Held Today

It’s election day and it’s shaping up to be the most important election ever!

How important? Experts predict that 12 percent of eligible adults will vote this year. Participants cite the need to “do something” as their primary motivator for getting out to vote. What drives them to decide to vote a certain way though?

Local resident James Janice, who waited until the last minute to vote today, stated “I’m looking forward to seeing what’s on the ballot when I get in there. Then I’ll go on my gut feeling to decide how I’m going to vote. Voting is very important to me, I vote every year!”

Other voters had different takes.

“I plan to vote straight-ticket,” says Gary Smart, an avid political activist in the area. According to John Jackson, who votes exclusively in general elections, he plans to vote for the winners. “I watch the polls, see what looks likely to win, and then vote for that. I’m all about picking the winners. You can’t lose that way!”

Online debate has been particularly fierce this year. A few weeks ago we asked our readers about how they planned to vote. Local resident Tim Johnson was roundly derided for stating he may stay home this year due to lack of choices on the ballot. Other respondents took turns telling him that he would be the reason the election doesn’t go their way and that all of our nation’s current political problems are his fault.

Organizations have worked diligently this year to produce voter education guides, ensuring the electorate are given the opportunity to make an informed vote. The most recent available data shows that a massive less than 1 percent of voters have opted to make use of these resources.

Mandated tracking systems to be installed on new cars in 2020

A new federal law set to go into effect in 2020 will require automotive manufacturers to install tracking systems in all new vehicles which can alert authorities to unsafe drivers. Continue reading

County to hire employees for ability to ignore irate citizens

Altruria County is set to hire hundreds of new employees later this month after the passage of several new tax measures.

Each department will see their ranks increase as part of a plan to create a better government according to a statement released by the commissioners’ court. Local residents can expect to see their new public servants to receive high pay, strong benefits, and to work far fewer days than private sector employees. Continue reading

Opioid addicts must experience the consequences of their actions

It is time we effectively tackle the opioid issue as we have previous problems by enforcing the consequences. Continue reading

Congress debates guns and abortion simultaneously

Congress took an unusual turn this week by negotiating abortion and gun rights at the same time. Continue reading

Christian and black protesters arrested after theater altercation

crime scene

A group of Christians and black protesters are behind bars after an altercation at a movie theater.

It began during a sold-out airing for the newly released film “Straight Outta Compton” when a small group of people began talking loudly and using profanity during the movie. The group then got into a verbal altercation with another group who began to complain before telling the loud group that they would “pray for them.” That group then stood up in their seats and began reciting prayers towards the direction of the first group. Continue reading

President’s secret memo leaked about planned illegal exit party and pardons

A secret memo concerning President Obama’s plans to throw an illegal party his final night in the White House has surfaced. Continue reading

Agents raid hair-dresser’s home over bad haircut, find marijuana

hairAgents raided a Texas woman’s home due to a tip-off from a customer who was not happy with their haircut.

State licensing requirements maintain that a cosmetologist may only perform services in a licensed and regulated environment which is separate from living spaces. The complaint alleged that the woman, 32-year-old Jasmin Daley, was operating an underground hair cutting and styling business. Continue reading

Local political activist group achieves success through no effort

A local political activist group has been accomplishing big things by holding monthly meetings and talking at one another about their political problems. Continue reading

2014 Super Bowl to feature Predator Drone demonstration

predator droneThe NFL announced today that they would be expanding the 2014 Super Bowl halftime show to include a predator drone demonstration. Continue reading