Chipping workers and monitoring their every move will make them more efficient

Restroom usage, casual conversations, leaning against the wall, blinking eyes, and generally unnecessary movement stops costs companies trillions in wasted productivity. This results in businesses having to pay unreasonable amounts of money to slacking employees who come to work but end up taking advantage of employers. This can be solved by measuring the bio-metrics of workers to ensure that they can no longer game the system and steal from the backbone of America. Continue reading


County to hire employees for ability to ignore irate citizens

Altruria County is set to hire hundreds of new employees later this month after the passage of several new tax measures.

Each department will see their ranks increase as part of a plan to create a better government according to a statement released by the commissioners’ court. Local residents can expect to see their new public servants to receive high pay, strong benefits, and to work far fewer days than private sector employees. Continue reading

Opioid addicts must experience the consequences of their actions

It is time we effectively tackle the opioid issue as we have previous problems by enforcing the consequences. Continue reading

Congress debates guns and abortion simultaneously

Congress took an unusual turn this week by negotiating abortion and gun rights at the same time. Continue reading

Man destined for failure during pool league night

A man is destined for failure in his local pool league this week after watching a video on Facebook of a professional billiards player making a sick shot in 9 Ball. Continue reading

New study shows Facebook prayers only 15% effective

FB Like

A new study recently released shows that people posting the word “prayers” on Facebook is only effective 15 percent of the time. Continue reading

Why We Returned Our Adorable Baby to the Hospital


My fiance and I did the unthinkable: We returned our 5-month-old baby to the hospital despite the fact that our family loved her and thought she was adorable. Continue reading