President’s secret memo leaked about planned illegal exit party and pardons

A secret memo concerning President Obama’s plans to throw an illegal party his final night in the White House has surfaced.

Private trade group Hass Productions is slated to plan and execute what some are terming as a “morally reprehensible” event which involves underage prostitutes and a dangerously addictive substance called THC oil, an extract from the marijuana plant.

President Obama’s underage daughters are said to be involved in what will be a weed-fueled event as supporters of the outgoing president grind the night away before being pardoned the next day.

In a final farewell, the president is expected to pardon the criminal actions of as many as half of the Democratic members of congress. He also plans to sign legislation into law which would legalize marijuana, but will ensure those already being prosecuted or serving time will not get any such pardon which his supporters will be receiving.

Hass Productions has been working discretely in the political circles of power for decades now, renown for their lavish parties where underage prostitutes are fed “shatter glass,” a form of THC, and then forced to perform sexual favors on high powered politicians.

The New New York Times originally reported on this memo with anonymous sources, however with the physical document now in hand, Obama is sure to suffer even more dismal ratings due to this alarming news.

Some political experts are claiming that the economy may tank in response to this, which will ultimately end up sweeping the issue under the rug.

Rumors have also been floating that ex-president George Bush will be in attendance, and private sources have confirmed that this is likely. Bush is rumored to have had a similar party during his final nights in office.

White House officials declined to comment on the matter.

By: George R.M. Spooner
Contact George via email at

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3 thoughts on “President’s secret memo leaked about planned illegal exit party and pardons

  1. search September 23, 2014 at 2:52 pm Reply

    I’m not sure where you’re getting your information, but great
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  2. ttvsearch September 26, 2014 at 11:12 am Reply
  3. Grow Up April 4, 2015 at 12:20 am Reply

    What an absolute load of hogwash. Interesting that you did not post the memo itself.

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