ALTRURIA, Texas — A six-year-old child accused of biting a dolls head off in a kindergarten classroom allegedly smoked K2, also known as “Spice,” before the incident.
Although school officials remain silent on the event, authorities from the Altruria police department were called to Altruria Elementary School on Friday afternoon, May 17, after a pipe and small bag of K2 were found in the child’s possession following an incident where the child allegedly bit the head off of a doll in a kindergarten classroom.
The child told authorities he obtained the substance from his uncle, who smokes the incense due to random drug testing from his probation officer stemming from a marijuana charge in June of 2012.
Altruria police confiscated the pipe and incense before calling the parents of the child.
“This is just another reason the war on drugs must continue,” a lead investigator, who asked to remain anonymous due to an ongoing investigation, told the Tribune Herald. “This substance is legal, and is safer than marijuana.
“Everyone wants to laugh and celebrate 4:20, but this is a serious issue. Drugs like marijuana lead to children eating dolls heads off and thinking that is normal.”
Kevin Sabet, founder of Project SAM (Smart Approaches to Marijuana), also weighed in on the issue.
“K2 and marijuana are one and the same,” Sabet said. “It’s like comparing margarine to butter. We all know marijuana kills; this is further proof. Do we really want a society filled with children eating people’s faces?”
The child is currently being suspended from the school while police investigate Friday’s events.
“There is an ongoing investigation into the incident involving a six-year-old smoking K2 incense at Altruria Elementary School on Friday, May 17,” the police department said in a press release sent to the media on Saturday morning.
“Due to this ongoing investigation, authorities will not comment further at this time.”
Stay tuned for further details as this case continues to unravel.
This article is a satirical production by Scotty Redick. Redick may be reached via email at Scotty.Redick@gmail.com.
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